We have had some serious excitement around our house the last couple days.
I received a text from one of Madalyn's friends parents.
"nameless child 1 says Madalyn told her about sex!"
WHAT?! WAIT! NOT MY GIRL
SHE'S ONLY 7 AND WE HAVE NOT TOLD HER ANYTHING ABOUT SEX
SHE STILL BELIEVES IN SANTA!
Thank goodness that mom contacted us!
I received a text from one of Madalyn's friends parents.
"nameless child 1 says Madalyn told her about sex!"
WHAT?! WAIT! NOT MY GIRL
SHE'S ONLY 7 AND WE HAVE NOT TOLD HER ANYTHING ABOUT SEX
SHE STILL BELIEVES IN SANTA!
Thank goodness that mom contacted us!
Apparently a girl on the bus is filling some of the kids in about what she knows or think she knows about sex.
Not just sex, but oral sex!
F%#@%^
MY BABY IS ONLY 7!
After initial panic I chatted with a couple mom friends about how to handle this stressful situation.
They all said the same thing.
"Talk to them and be honest"
I was not ready for this at such a young age.
After a debrief with The Farmer
We had a family meeting and it went like this:
Momma "We would like you to tell us about (nameless child 2) that rides your bus"
Both kids "she isn't nice, she takes peoples things, she says inappropriate things"
Momma "Like what kind of inappropriate things"
Jameson "well she says um you tell her I can't remember" looking at Mad
Momma "you do remember cause you don't forget anything. It's ok to tell us because we need to know"
Madalyn "she says that a daddy licks a mommy's private parts to have a baby"
Now in my head I am FREAKING OUT, but trying to stay calm.
We share that that information is false and that when anyone tells you information that you might think is inappropriate that you need to tell us, their teachers, bus driver.
We inform the babes that they can come to us with any questions, concerns and that they never have to fear being in trouble.
Not ever.
After some more chatting I ask if they have any questions and Madalyn who has her feet on the coffee table says
"why is one of my feet bigger than the other?"
to which Jameson tries to explain
Maybe she was trying to make a stressful chat less stressful?
The world is big and scary and the older I get the more scary I think it is.
I want to wrap my kids in bubble wrap, put them in a bubble in a padded room.
We have got to gain some control on what our kids are hearing and doing.
Even the so called family friendly Disney Channel isn't always safe.
They have kids laying in bed making out.
With texting and social media a whole new element of parenting comes into play.
Communication is key I think.
We HAVE to talk to our kids even when it is hard and uncomfortable.
We HAVE to be their parents not their friends.
I cringe when I hear parents refer to their kids as best friends.
A couple months ago Madalyn was shocked and appalled when I informed her that in fact I wasn't her friend and wouldn't be until she was an adult.
I told her my job as a mom was to make sure that she could grow into a responsible adult and that she has plenty of friends.
Personally, I think some parents tell their kids way to much.
The Farmer and I are very careful with what information we share openly with our kids.
Now this doesn't mean we aren't honest with them when they ask, but we do make sure that we know exactly what they are asking.
I can get way ahead of myself and answer questions that they really aren't asking.
I also don't think questions have to be answered right away.
It is perfectly fine to tell your kids you need to talk to your spouse and get back to them.
I have an emotional trigger and sometimes I need The Farmer to give me a logical perspective.
This parenting gig is only going to get harder, but we are doing our best.
We are learning as we go and thankful that we have a village to help us process the hard stuff.
My best friend always tells me "it's going to be fine"
She's right
After stressing the entire day yesterday about how our family meeting would go
not only was it fine we started an open communication foundation with our kids.
After this answering the "is Santa real?" is going to be stroll in the park!
Talk to your kids.
Know what they are thinking.
Know who their friends are.
Know who and what they are texting, gaming and posting on social websites.
Stay connected in words face to face.
Even when it's hard.
Blessed is me...
Not just sex, but oral sex!
F%#@%^
MY BABY IS ONLY 7!
After initial panic I chatted with a couple mom friends about how to handle this stressful situation.
They all said the same thing.
"Talk to them and be honest"
I was not ready for this at such a young age.
After a debrief with The Farmer
We had a family meeting and it went like this:
Momma "We would like you to tell us about (nameless child 2) that rides your bus"
Both kids "she isn't nice, she takes peoples things, she says inappropriate things"
Momma "Like what kind of inappropriate things"
Jameson "well she says um you tell her I can't remember" looking at Mad
Momma "you do remember cause you don't forget anything. It's ok to tell us because we need to know"
Madalyn "she says that a daddy licks a mommy's private parts to have a baby"
Now in my head I am FREAKING OUT, but trying to stay calm.
We share that that information is false and that when anyone tells you information that you might think is inappropriate that you need to tell us, their teachers, bus driver.
We inform the babes that they can come to us with any questions, concerns and that they never have to fear being in trouble.
Not ever.
After some more chatting I ask if they have any questions and Madalyn who has her feet on the coffee table says
"why is one of my feet bigger than the other?"
to which Jameson tries to explain
Maybe she was trying to make a stressful chat less stressful?
The world is big and scary and the older I get the more scary I think it is.
I want to wrap my kids in bubble wrap, put them in a bubble in a padded room.
We have got to gain some control on what our kids are hearing and doing.
Even the so called family friendly Disney Channel isn't always safe.
They have kids laying in bed making out.
With texting and social media a whole new element of parenting comes into play.
Communication is key I think.
We HAVE to talk to our kids even when it is hard and uncomfortable.
We HAVE to be their parents not their friends.
I cringe when I hear parents refer to their kids as best friends.
A couple months ago Madalyn was shocked and appalled when I informed her that in fact I wasn't her friend and wouldn't be until she was an adult.
I told her my job as a mom was to make sure that she could grow into a responsible adult and that she has plenty of friends.
Personally, I think some parents tell their kids way to much.
The Farmer and I are very careful with what information we share openly with our kids.
Now this doesn't mean we aren't honest with them when they ask, but we do make sure that we know exactly what they are asking.
I can get way ahead of myself and answer questions that they really aren't asking.
I also don't think questions have to be answered right away.
It is perfectly fine to tell your kids you need to talk to your spouse and get back to them.
I have an emotional trigger and sometimes I need The Farmer to give me a logical perspective.
This parenting gig is only going to get harder, but we are doing our best.
We are learning as we go and thankful that we have a village to help us process the hard stuff.
My best friend always tells me "it's going to be fine"
She's right
After stressing the entire day yesterday about how our family meeting would go
not only was it fine we started an open communication foundation with our kids.
After this answering the "is Santa real?" is going to be stroll in the park!
Talk to your kids.
Know what they are thinking.
Know who their friends are.
Know who and what they are texting, gaming and posting on social websites.
Stay connected in words face to face.
Even when it's hard.
Blessed is me...
No comments:
Post a Comment