Wednesday, December 4, 2013

I wear underwear!

Yesterday when I got dressed I slipped on my black Zella Live In leggings, a long thick black tank and a brown boyfriend cut sweatshirt.
Add some super cute boot socks and some brown boots and you have a recipe for a cute outfit!
Oh, I also put on underwear!

I guess this is a topic of conversation between women.
Underwear with leggings?!
Yes, underwear.
I wear underwear with leggings, and pants, and skirts, and jammies.
I know not everyone thinks that you should wear underwear, but I do it anyways.
I'm reckless like that.
I also don't wear string, thong or any other underwear that only has a sliver of fabric and here is why.
They make me feel big, fat and uncomfortable.

There isn't enough fabric on the sides to not dig into my squishy body causing a dent that no legging will hide.
In fact on some there isn't even fabric there is just an elastic type band.
Unless you have a rock hard body or 0% body fat those damn things are going to dig in.
I stand most of the day at work and those stupid things ruin my day.
When my day gets ruined I get crabby and when I get crabby
you wont want to be around me.
No, seriously you don't.

So, I wear  bikini underwear.
You know the type.
Old ladies wear them.
I guess that makes me an old lady.
I don't care because I am comfortable.

What about panty lines?
Who cares!
I could care less if you know I have underwear on.
I wonder if people whisper "oh my word Kallie has undewear on" 
Get over it!
If you don't want to see my panty lines.
Don't look at my behind!
I also always wear a LONG tank when I wear legging and it covers most of my behind.

Besides, whoever thought that the smallest least amount of fabric was a great idea for underwear should be poked in the eye with a hot stick.
If it didn't impede my breathing I would wear a full body spanx everyday to smooth out all my lumps, bumps and squishiness.
Then I wouldn't have to worry about dents from underwear, muffin tops or any of that other stuff that makes women feel bad about how they look.
Breathing is important so I have to forgo the spanx especially if I want to sit down at any point during the day.

 I also don't think The Farmer cares what kind of underwear I have on and he is the only that sees my underwear anyways.
That is unless my kids are in my room when I get dressed.
They also don't seem to care.

This brings up a side point. When I was finishing up Christmas shopping for the kids I was getting them new underwear.
Madalyn is 7 and she wears size 8 clothes.
The styles available in addition of briefs for her size of underwear are:
Bikini, hipster and low rise.
I for one and not ready to even discuss why I would have on barely there undies and she doesn't get to.
She will be wearing briefs well into her 40's.
Oh, and ankle length skirts, high neck shirts and long sleeves.

So there you have it you now know I wear underwear with leggings and my bra can double as a tow strap.
That Farmer is a lucky guy!

Blessed is me...

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